Just Like Yesterday

It is over fourteen years now, that I told my seven year old son that I have HIV and that I will be dying soon. I told him not to worry too much that my Mum and elder brother will take good care of him, because back then I was a single parent. All the things I told him affected him physiologically and emotionally to the extent that he became absent minded in school and on two occasions, he ran out of home.

Four years later, my elder brother was also diagnosed of having the HIV virus and in the year 2005, my mum was diagnosed of have cancer of the lower intestine. I felt devastated as all hope was lost and the thought and imagination of how I wouldn’t be able to see my child grow caused me lots of pain. I asked myself of what essence is my life if I can’t nurture my own child the way I want.

Today, all these are but mere memories because that very same boy is now a university graduate of mathematics. This year he will be 24 years old.

You know how life can be: man opposes but God disposes. Who am I that God is so mindful of me? I ask. Who am I that He loves me unconditionally? I also ask.

I am extremely thankful to God for where He has brought me thus far. The gift of life he gave to me, His grace upon me and my son, for not allowing all my negative thoughts to come to pass. All I can say is thank you God because what I feel Is beyond words can even describe.

Also I am thankful to my late parents for giving me the courage to pull through. They never gave up on me and they supported me all the way. For me, it was a dream that I thought could never come to pass seventeen years ago because back then there weren’t much information about HIV and AIDS.

I am over 40 years old, now a mother of 3children (2boys, 1girl) who are HIV negative, I am married to a wonderful man, and I have a beautiful family that I’m grateful to God for.

So I am using my story to encourage everyone out there that is facing such a challenge not to give up or lose hope over any predicament and also, do not write yourself off when God hasn’t written you off.