Sonya posted a new blog Remove Your Mask on A Girl Like Me’s “Voices from our Allies” page:
½ of my LIFE, I’ve lived behind a MASK…for a MAN. I hid my true self, true feelings & true sexual desires. I neglected my wants and gave into the desires of my flesh…For a Man!
½ of my LIFE, I’ve lived behind a MASK…not wanting to expose my deep aches & pains, my brokenness and hid behind broken smiles, ½ hugs, kind words, so I wouldn’t couldn’t feel any pain.
½ of my LIFE, I’ve lived behind this MASK…as a Mother, Wife, and Woman. Feeling like my dreams dried up like a raisin in the sun, imprisoned, and bounded by false pre-tenses.
½ of my LIFE, I realized that this MASK & me couldn’t be together anymore. Understanding I would be revealing myself to the world, but more importantly to MYSELF!
So, I sit here with my MASK removed, and share with you today some wisdom about HIV/AIDS, Life Intellect, & Knowledge. I want you to make an informed decision about the MASK you have on.
HIV/AIDS are running rampant in my community and the communities around the world. It seems like nobody really cares every 9 ½ minutes someone is infected with HIV in the United States, or the neighbor next door to me is on the ADAP waiting list awaiting approval for his medication that might prolong his life, or decriminalization is turning into a witch hunt in some states.
½ of your LIFE, you have been frightened, alone, scared, depressed, and hiding behind your MASK. You know who you are…so adamant that no one will ever know that you are HIV+, because the STIGMA is too huge. How long will you stay there? How long is too long for you?
Let’s Erase the Stigma One Voice At A Time, so that so many more including YOU can remove the MASK.
You better say that! (Standing and Applauding)
Removing the mask
Wow! I really needed to hear this. Also the blog of the month I read. Fantastic.
Lets see if I can say anything. I am hiding.
I am lying. I am being fake .
I am the only one paying for it.
This Stigma and social ingnorance of HIV ( HERE ANYWAY) its literally killing me, I cant eat, sleep, think, function. I just completely lost me. The summit was amazing. I thought this is my passion I can do this publicly; come to find out I am not as bold as I believed . I face shit like I know whats going on only to hurt so bad when alone. I am losing the best thing I ever knew ME.
This freaking sucks. I lost the best part of me when I started listening to what people say and the actions against me . I am so damn tired.
I will not walk away without fighting. I put on my mask in public. Strong girl , capable, smart, funny then I remember I am living with HIV .
I dont know what life was like before testing positive. Nothing is the same. I never been so ok with hiding and isolating. I am so happy you shared this. Today is a new day. I get up with the full intentions of being who I am; So before I get depressed Thank you. I shall have coffee , shower , tell the girl in the mirror to remember change is change and I am changing. Embrace the day Its a gift ;thats what I can do now.
On the advocay front , I helped a girl get back on meds. I handle life with others amazing like I know and I can, then I dropped her off and did not a thing . I cant even say I thought. Have a great day. You really perked my mind up I needed that.