YOU GET TIRED! I know I must give hope and be "positive", but I have been in bed for 2 weeks with a horrible cold! FEVER, CHILLS, COUGH, ACHES, HEADACHE...horrible!! I know we all get colds, but it just sucks when you have a freaking low immune system and multiple things are attacking you!! They also did a culture in the ER when Lisa took me April 18th and found a freaking bacteria ENETEROCOCCUS (E coli) that I was told by my doc during the same situation. :(
So I got my results for VL and Tcells today..and THANK GOD I am undetectable! My Tcells did go down a little from the highest they have ever been 450 to 398..but it is still above 200!! And even 39 Tcells which is when I was at my lowest! Maybe they are even lower now that I am fighting this bacteria and strong viral cold ..but I am taking antibiotics. What keeps me going is that I am a STRONG FIGHTER! We all need to continue fighting! I may feel like shit now..but tomorrow is another day and at least I have medicine, and a person next to me that has my back! Many that pray for me and love me, and God that helps me to continue helping others even when I am sick! Today was the first day I got up from bed after 2 weeks! I am better and tomorrow will be another day! I HATE HIV/AIDS! Whennnnnnnnnnnn willllllllllllll pharma have the compassion and empathy to leave greed aside to maybe show more interest in finding a cure??? When??? 30 plus years with this bitch in our lives is enough! The system is overloaded! Drs are overloaded! THERE IS A LACK OF MEDS! FUNDS ARE BEING TAKEN AWAY! AND PEOPLE CONTINUE TO GET INFECTED!
I dont want to end up bitter and just wash my hands and say EFF IT!.. I TRIED AND I TRIED and people should know better these days! Protect themselves, etc! But I have empathy and compassion and I hope I never lose this! As I was told by my doctor today... THANK GOD THAT ENTEROCOCCUS (E coli) DIDNT GET IN YOUR BLOOD!! Because I would have been deathly ill!! It amazes me how I could have this for quite some time, have so many fevers etc and still be here and there..non stop! I am glad I was able to celebrate my 40th bday happy...even if the next day I dropped sick in bed with all of the symptoms mentioned above.
I am sorry everyone if I am cursing ..but I am frustrated and tired :( But I will not lose hope and keep on keeping on. I will continue to have that fighting spirit and just continue taking care of myself and hope to make it to Miami AIDS walk tomorrow :) I will try and my spirit will continue to push me through<3
I am not always love and light as you can see..I AM HUMAN !
Please send me prayers, love and light
Love you all <3
Maria T Mejia
you will be ok soon , I love you very much ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, your mom
Maria, I am keeping you in my prayers and heart. I know God is Able <3
ty mom! I love you...the storm is passing :)
@sonya ty for your prayers :) God has always been with me and I have helped myself with endurance and never giving up <3 I always know that in the deepest darkness I will find the light and I am seeing it now <3
M, I am sending you well wishes & healing. I am also reading your piece & recognize the level of frustration you expressed in my own experiences as an ally. It is because of you & others like you I continue to do this work. Please know that you are not alone.
Hi Maria. I recognize your pain as i myself have just been off work for almost a week battling the cold/flu. Please keep strong as i really enjoy reading your blog, u truly inspire me. U are in my prayers. Love always
ty so much Tiffany. finally the storm is passing :) what a ride! omg...I am glad I am on top of my health and do everything in my power to be healthy. it is not an easy thing ..but we must continue to fight ..even when we are weak and so sick. AIDS is a bitch and it will always be a bitch. but It still has not taken me down and I will fight until my last breathe
love and light
@lovelylady I hope you are feeling better sweety <3 I am finally coming out of this storm <3
love and light