I have not disclosed to many people. I've told my parents, sister, grandparents, my best friend and of course my co-workers who were around my desk when I received my diagnosis. Writing this blog has allowed me to work through some of my issues and become more accepting and understanding of my status. As a result of this, I believe I am to the point of wanting to share my story.
An opportunity presented itself at Bible study not long ago. However, I couldn't bring myself to share. But I recently had another opportunity. My office hired a new employee. I've gotten along with her very well and have had some great conversations, getting to know her more and more. Then one afternoon when we were by ourselves in the office, an opportunity came up in our conversation for me to disclose my status as HIV+.
As I was telling her, I could feel the blood rushing through me...I felt hot. I knew I must have been blushing. I was embarrassed...I felt so vulnerable. She looked at me and said her Uncle had died of AIDS. She went on to tell me that she was the primary caregiver to him toward the end of his life and one of the only people who would hug him. She then came around my desk and HUGGED me. I felt accepted and calm. And to be perfectly honest, relieved that she had not ran out of the room!
What great relief it was to disclose to someone so caring and understanding! I know all of my disclosures will not go this well, but it was simply heartwarming to know that people do understand and not everyone is afraid of you.
I give thums up to you for actually speaking out. It can not be easy but it was a stepping stone. My prayers are with you always. I would love to keep in contact with you of that is ok.
Dear Katie, isn't it amazing how the cosmos, the gods can meet our needs when we least expect it but when we need it the most.
Love, acceptance and understanding came to you because you love, you understand and you accept.
I'm happy for you that your disclosure renewed your hope in the kindness you deserve.
peace and courage, Gisèle
Hullo Katie i really understand what you are saying i remember the way i disclosed to my mother was when the father of my son in a spit of anger decided to send my mother a text message telling her i was positive. i was at work. i returned home and she calmly asked about it. i told her it was true and she told me not to worry and asked me if i was already on medication. she told me i would live long if i didn't stress my self. it was surely one of the best moments. the most recent disclosure had a similar outcome like yours. a friend i had met in a ladies fellowship was the one i told about my status. tears were flowing from my eyes as she hugged me. she told me i was such a lovely person and strong and promised to encourage me through prayer which she continues to do. i have been blessed by disclosure and i encourage others to do so. its not easy to do but when you choose to do so the relief and understanding that one receives is far greater than the fear. i for one can testify to that.
be blessed
Joy
I so much like your courage. This is what we need to keep on with life.
HUGS
only two people know my status:my brother and my roommate who are also a mentor and a friend.i now know there is no shame in being +ve and i should let people know.they maybe the ones to help me cope in this life