Cupcake80

My name is Jaime. I am a 39 yr old (almost 40-in Feb) Mother of a 20 year old son. I have just stumbled across The Wellness Project and A Girl Like Me and it gave me hope and suddenly made me feel not so alone.
I was diagnosed with HIV3/AIDS July 2018. After years and years of crazy diagnosis' and strange health complications and then a full 6 months of seeking help telling Dr's I knew I was dying whom (I believe prejudged my outward appearance) told me there was nothing wrong with me other than asthma and allergies (which I'd never had) and suggested my gallbladder be removed....I finally landed in the ICU early July 2018, days away from death, my heart and organs were suffering with a PSO% of merely 52, I was placed on life support. When I woke I was given my diagnosis which included 2 opportunistic infections raging thru my lungs and body; PCP & Cryptococcus. I had a viral load of over 717,000 and CD4 was only 34. I was paralyzed from muscle loss while on life support and had to go thru physical therapy just to walk and write again. After a month and a half in hospitals I made it home on oxygen, with a walker and home healthcare. The day I went on life support my husband left. After a year of us battling his stage 4 cancer and beating it, the stress of my health (and partially him thinking Drs were right, and thinking I was making up how sick I felt for attention) He relapsed on drugs and alcohol after years of sobriety. Needless to say I had a battle on my hands, heart, body, mind & soul. I was so terrified and lost that one heavily medicated night while in hospital I came to the conclusion the only way to face this was head on and I came out to everyone I know thru social media (i did tell my immediate family first). Many of whom had been following my illness, were concerned and kept checking on me and I didn't know how I could go thru the pain of telling it over and over again to everyone individually. And thought if I didn't come out about it I'd suffocate behind not being my authentic self 100% and trying to hide it. I was lucky in that everyone has been very supportive.
By the Grace of God and modern medicine my viral load was undetectable in 90 days. My cd4 has been a battle but its finally above 300. The last year and a half has been a fight emotionally, physically, spiritually and over the holidays I have once again been diagnosed with a new opportunistic infectious disease NTM MAC and am beginning 1 year of treatment.
Other than sharing the way I did I have secluded myself. I have (unknowingly) refrained from finding community. I am here to change that!!