Depression strikes again i haven't been sleep in a day in a half ,i dont know whats going on .My doctor prescribed depression pills a week ago, but hell all they do is make me sleep.I cant take that mess it keeps me in bed and inactive.How is that helping my depression i guess by sleeping i feel nothing,i called my doctor he recommended me going to mental health .I have been going back and forth in my head about going and im wondering do i really need that another stigma to deal with as if the hiv isn't already enough to deal with .I called mental health they told me all new patients have to be a walk in they only set appointments for clients.Im really going crazy now i have to be in line by 8 am wondering if ill see someone i know,then she said its a 3 hour process from start to finish for new patients im like really .I mainly just need someone going threw my stuggles to have to talk and vent and cry just let go and not hold in . I dont need no more meds im already trying to cope with taking this damn hiv medication everyday.There is a support group in my city for ppl living with hiv, so i read up on it abd watched videos on you tube it seems right for me .I have one road block tho stopping me i see ppl on the video that come to my job for services, and i almost had a heart attack.I am so scared of ppl at my job knowing from ppl telling them i was at group for hiv.I feel like it will help but then bring me down into a deeper depression if everyone knew.MY only other option is mental health counseling cause my insurance doesnt pay for counseling unless its for behavioral health .I found this web site yesterday so im just praying this will be a solution and a great outlet.
Don't let fear of stigma keep
Don't let fear of stigma keep you from seeking the assistance that you need. You matter! Your life and your health matter! And that includes your mental health. Girl! Put on some big sunglasses and tie a scarf around your head and go to that appointment! I can't stress enough how much you matter! HIV is something you have not something you are so don't let it stop you from living your best life!
Thank you
I needed that i just am so scared when i get back to work everyone will know.Im newly diagnosed and still trying to cope and accept this shit,so that extra stress will devastate me at work being judged im so scared.
I'm glad you found us
Hi there, I'm so glad you found us--you will see there is a lot of information to help battle the stigma you are feeling. So much of what you are experiencing are such natural emotions, but please know it will get better. We have a huge library of fact sheets with information, including this one: https://www.thewellproject.org/hiv-information/did-you-just-test-hiv. Also, our blog, A Girl Like Me, shares the experiences of a beautiful community of diverse women, several of whom began blogging not too long after their diagnosis, and it was a great way to connect with others (either anonymously or not). Check out the blogs (upper right corner of bio page) of https://www.thewellproject.org/users/destiny-smith, https://www.thewellproject.org/users/forevertrue24, and https://www.thewellproject.org/a-girl-like-me/aglm-blogs/intro-tamera are just a few who began blogging pretty soon in their diagnosis, so it may be helpful to read their blogs from past to present. There are a lot more resources, too, and we are happy to help you however we can. Please feel free to vent or ask questions--as that is what we're here for! You can also email me offline if you have any questions: kmartel@thewellproject.org. Sending love and strength.
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