parenting

I don't feel like myself at all. I have often heard people talk about how they lose themselves after they have kids, that's where I feel I am.

This gone sound crazy. But I don't know how to be no woman. I mean, especially not good enough to teach another woman how to do it. I just be doing shit. ... trying on different versions of myself....

Today I cried. In unison with my newly born son and toddling daughter. I sat right there on the corner of the couch and I cried, weeped even- inconsolable, exhausted, unusually heavy.