I'm going to go out on a limb and assume something. Don't get mad if I'm overstepping or overstating. I know it doesn't apply to everyone, but it's common enough. It's just a little something that I know to be true for me, and over time have found to be true for others. If you've been taking antiretroviral therapy (ART) for any longer than—let's say a year and a half or more—you've experienced some form of pill fatigue. Brand new to HIV or a long-term survivor, you've felt it, even if it was just a fleeting emotion. I'm using it as an all-encompassing term to include all sorts of emotions and feelings about HIV medication.
It could be that you're sick and tired of taking a pill that literally makes you sick and tired. Physical manifestations of HIV medication side effects are real. Maybe you have been taking multiple pills since the Bangles were walking like an Egyptian across the charts and you're just over it. A person having to hide medication from family and friends as you hide your status can create not only pill fatigue, but pill anxiety and adherence issues. Or, like me, you just feel a vague sense of resentment that you have to pop a pill to stay healthy. To say nothing of the agitation and irritation of dealing with refills, insurance, and co-pay melodrama. Mental and emotional side effects of ART therapy are real.
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